DEDICATION or DEFECATION! Make your choice.

Ever have days where you feel like shit? ...and all your ideas are shitty too? I think women may experience this more often then men, or perhaps the feeling is simply more pronounced, especially around a certain time of the month. Today, I woke up thinking, "What the hell am I thankful for today??" Not that I can't name a thousand things I am remotely happy about in one way or another, but that lacks depth and sincerity, and is not the point of this project. I took myself to the routine Sunday church service in hopes of encountering some sort of revelation. Nope!! I was dastardly mistaken to think I would find it in this morning's sermon which turned out to be completely inapplicable to me. The guest pastor proceeded to speak about relationships, most prominently marriage and parenting. Not very relatable subject matter to me at this point. In fact, all it served to do was remind me of how single I currently am. Can I get a witness? So as I left church, I argued with God in my head pleading, "Lord, you gotta help me out here!! I'm trying." Of course, the longing to just dump this whole idea became shattered by the fore-sensing of disappointment in myself that would undoubtedly set in at the act of not following through. So I resolvedly shook my head in defiance of my mediocre emotional state, and proclaimed to the universe, "There will be no flaking out!! I am dedicated to this commitment!!!" ...and just like that, BINGO!... DEDICATION.

Dedication. What is commitment without dedication? ..empty words or promises? ..or maybe wishful thinking of having every circumstance, person, or feeling involved be perfectly conducive to the established goal? Like that's really going to happen! So then... dedication is the difference between an aimless dreamer and a dreamer who witnesses their dream become reality. It is the bridge between resolution and result, the energy force that turns fiction into non-fiction. I like non-fiction; it is drastically under-rated. We live in a fantastical world where gratification is instantaneous, and if it is not for any reason, it isn't worth the effort. Then we wonder why accurate statistics inform us that only 10% of the world's population controls over 90% of the world's assets. I have observed and believe that this ratio applies across the field to every other aspect of life: peaceful individuals, happy marriages, effective people, fulfilled human beings, and the number of those who actually follow through. Since I came across that fact, and I have read it from multiple sources, I have confidently declared: "I am 10% baby!" Well, now I realize the amount of perseverance that is required to truly be "dedicated" to an end, and it doesn't come naturally. Instead, it comes willfully and regardless of ease of performance. Some days I will be excited to stay the course, and other days, I will want to throw myself off a bridge! LOL!

When I started this blog, I was hopeful as to it's outcome, and I wanted to set parameters that were realistic yet challenging. It is challenging to say the least! When I have to, I write it at work on my phone. No matter what the hour, when I arrive home I spellcheck it and post it; and everyday, I try my utmost to infuse it with the deepest sincerity and gratitude I possess. I will not deny that at moments when I am tired, feel burnt out, or lack inspiration, I wonder, "Whose bright idea was this?" and, "What did I get myself into?" But I honestly believe I will be a better person for it and will develop a level of discipline I have not known and need. As with any worthwhile commitment, the process and completion of it may not always be comfortable, but the rewards are usually amazing and go beyond the expected benefits.

I read somewhere, "DON'T GROW A WISHBONE WHERE YOUR BACKBONE SHOULD BE." It has become one of my favorite quotes. You can't wish to do something great; You have to DO something great that you've wished. Like in the physical world, the road to majestic vistas are rugged and filled with obstacles on a steep incline, but the acquired eagle's eye view is breathtaking and unlike any other. So are the ways to grand accomplishments and worthy causes. For better or for worse, I will stick it out; if for anything at all but to be a woman of my word whenever possible.

Finally, my closing thought: DEDICATION or DEFECATION! Make your choice. If you aren't dedicated to making any area of your life the best it could be.. life, without question, has a way of chewing you up and defecating you out in that particular area. Conclusion: Even if I feel like poop, I still rather do what is required of me to make it right, than to let life poop me out! ;)